I am so so sorry you went through/are going through this pain too. Yes, it sucks so very badly! And when you choose to stay, there will always be those 'little things' that creep back into your head! Ugh. I know things will get better (they are getting better) but I wish the pain and feelings of 'not good enough' would go away ASAP. My sister who was my also my best friend did this to me. I HATE talking about her anymore or all of this but I know it could help me heal. Reach out to me anytime! HUGS to you!